heart.
Hello. My name is
TengkuSuerayaHanie.
i HATE hypocrytes and manipulaters
Currently being forced to gain knowledge in SMKUSJ13
I LOVE TO CRAP , SERIOUSLY haha
see me , talk to me , walk away frm me BUT remember me fr a lifetime (:
Saturday, September 27, 2008!
HandWritten on; 9/27/2008
alright listen up people ! this is important !
i have changed my blog . i mean like i've made a new blog .
hehe . sooo pleeasee re-link me yea . i wont delete this blog bcz i wnt to make ths blog as a memory . aww . hee .
sooo , pls visit my new blog yeaa (:
cheers !
blog : suesuee.blogspot.com
Tuesday, September 23, 2008!
HandWritten on; 9/23/2008
hari raya is just around the corner and im NOT gonna say that i cnt wait to go back to kelantan since EVERY SINGLE TIME when i went back to kelantan , SURELY something bad'll happen . im actually getting used of it already . haha . well , i dnt mean that i dislike going back but i dnt know . thre's nothing much to do thre . it's a very VERY boring place . trust me . you wouldnt wanna go thre . i think i'll be sleeping over at nenek's place which is at ANAK IKAN , Besut , Terengganu . haha i know . the name anak ikan would wnt to make you laugh your heads off rght ? i dnt knw why kelantan people like to put funny names to their kampung . i mean , imagine you're meeting some new friends and they asked whre do you live ? and you say : " oh i live in anak ikan " . OBVIOUSLY the friend thre wld be like -.- uhhhh huh ? hahaha . okay dh stop .
fr the persiapan raya here , we just put up the lampu kelip2 . aha . AND dnt forget listening the lagu rayas in the morning otw to schl . haha . here's a pic which i dnt know why i ws so semangat-ed to put it in my blog . haha ,
haha , semangat kan ? well , nothing to do kan , wth . heheheh .
to be honest with y'all , i am currently in a relationship with 'hotlink' . haha -.-' hotlink has been messaging me non-stop maan . seriously rimas . haih i know , LAME . hahahah . so ? making the best out of my life la niiii . tk salaah . haha . fortunately , benedict choong has been complaining that i've been posting loadsome of depressing blog nowadays . hahaha . okay im trying not to ? great great . hee (:
HAAA !! you guys should really watch this movie called " freedom writers " . seriously the best . the movie teaches you abt racialism , working hard , and so on lah . haha . i love love looovveee the movie . well , fr me to be embarassed abt something , eventhough the movie is abt troubled kids and their lives , i almost cried watching it . hahaha . laugh at that ! the casts are not familiar to me but wth la kan ? hehe . oh i know one of them lah , Mario and Hilary Swank (:
so thats it ! hee . go check it out okaaay (: byeee .
Saturday, September 20, 2008!
HandWritten on; 9/20/2008
THE LOVE GURU (:
here's a blog which i dnt think y'all understand . haha but wth , i dnt want y'll to understand pn . hehe . good luck on reading it ! hee
ओम्ग एस , इ'ल पोस्ट अ (मय्बे) लॉन्ग ब्लॉग , एंड एमो ब्लॉग तो बे एक्जेक्ट . एंड थिस इस वही इ दंत वांट एनी ऑफ़ यू रेअदेरस तो उन्देर्स्तंद सिंस इट्स रेगार्डिंग माय लोवेलिफे एंड ठस इन्वोल्वेस थे पीपुल ठाट नोट मानी पीपुल विल लिखे थेम तो बे सैद हियर . वेल , सॉरी बुत आईटी'स माय ब्लॉग (: हैः . तो बे होनेस्त , इ विल नोट ओनली से इ लिखे हेल्मी , बुत इ लव हेल्मी . एस पीपुल , मोहद. हेल्मी नासिर . इ कांत देस्क्रिबे मच ओं हाउ मच इ लव हिम बुत येः . थिस इस वहत इ और पेर्हप्स वे कॉल थे "चिंता बेर्तेपुक सेबेलाह तनगन" . हाहा नोट तो बे थे जिवंग बेर्कारत पुण्य मीनः बुत सीरियसली , इ लव हिम लिखे हेल . एंड इ वल्ड लव तो तेल यू गुयस थे फुल स्टोरी बुत इ'म अफ्रैद ठाट आईटी'ल हर्ट सम पीपुल और मय्बे म्य्सेल्फ़ . okay here we go ,
थे नेम 'हेल्मी' एन्तेरेड माय लाइफ'स दिक्तिओनर्य बी सरह सनुसी . एंड मय्बे समीर ? हम . सरह वेंट तो थे समे सचल अस हेल्मी दोएस बेफोरे किंग इन्तो मीन . एंड समीर वेंट तो थे समे टूशन अस हेल्मी . सो थे टोल्ड में सतोरिएस अबत हेल्मी . थे सैद ठाट हेल्मी वस फुन्न्य एंड मय्बे वाक्क्य . थे टोल्ड में सतोरिएस अबत हेल्मी एंड तिकोत . एंड ठाट टाइम इ वास इन लव विथ माय एक्स . सो इ दंत कुइते केयर अबत ओथेर गुयस . सो ठोस सतोरिएस जुस्त एंडेड तेरे . फुल्ल्स्तोप . फर कुइते सम टाइम , सोमेथिंग हप्पेनेद , एंड माय एक्स ठाट टाइम कॉल्ड सरह एंड समीर कज हे कोउल्ड'टी राच में . सो मय्बे थे द्द्न्त हवे एनी क्र्द्त ? सो थे सैद तहत थे बोर्रोवेद हेल्मी'स फ़ोन तो कॉल में . सो ठाट टाइम , थे कांताक्ट 'हेल्मी १३' एन्तेरेड माय फ़ोन'स कांताक्ट बुक -.- फर अबत २ और ३ मंथ्स ? इ शिफ्टेड सचल तो समक उस्ज १३ अंडर सम उनवोइदाब्ले रेअसोंस . एंड अत ठाट टाइम इ ओनली क्नेव अकाप , नज्म , मरल एंड तेरा . नो मोरे नो लेस . इ वस नर्वस फॉर गोद'स सके ! तो माय क्नोविंग्स , इ गोत इन्तो थे समे कलस अस हेल्मी'स . ग्रेट . बुत इ द्द्न्त क्नोव हिम एंड इ दंत कुइते केयर ? हाहा . थें इ क्नोव ठाट हे ढ ऑफ़ दगं तिकोत . स्टील , माय मंद सैद "सो ?" . तिल ओने टाइम , इ लिखे हिम . इ अच्तुअल्ली लिखे हिम . इ थौघ्त आईटी वस जुस्त अ मेन२ पुण्य लिखे बुत सोमेहोव आईटी बच्क्फिरेड . सिंस थें , एवेरी रेलातिन्शिप ठाट इ'वे गोत्तें म्य्सेल्फ़ इन्तो , मुस्त बे कांसिदेरेड बी थे नेम "हेल्मी" . फर एक्साम्प्ले , व्हेन अ गाए अस्क्स तो बे माय बोय्फ़ , इ'ल बे थिंकिंग "अल , हेल्मी ? न्त इफ दिया सुका अकू समने ?" तेरे आईटी गोएस . हम . थें , आईएम सिंगल . ततबे हे ओं स्कंडल बालक दगं तिकोत . फुक्क ! इ संत एक्सेप्ट थे फक्त बुत वथ इ संत दो अन्य्थिंग . इ जुस्त कपट माय कूल . हे क्नोव्स ठाट इ लिखे हिम . बुत व्हेन हे अस्केद फ़ना , शे सैद ठाट इ ढ तक सुका हिम ब्च्ज़ शे वस कोवेरिंग फर में ? इद्क . ओके लाह . सो नो , आईएम क्रेजी अबत हिम . इ कांत स्टैंड आईटी . सीरियसली . इट्स किल्लिंग में व्हेन इ क्नोव ठाट हे दोएस्न्त लिखे में अत अल एंड तकेस में अस जुस्त अ फ्रेंड नोट मोरे थान ठाट . हैः . एवेंथौघ मोस्ट ऑफ़ ओउर क्लास्स्मतेस क्नोव्स ठाट इ लिखे हिम . एंड थे कपट तेअसिंग उस . इद्क , इ वांट तो मोवे ओं कज इ क्नोव इट्स हार्ड फर हिम तो मोवे ओं फ्रॉम तिकोत . इ क्नोव . बुत येत इ कांत मोवे ओं . एवेर्य्तिमे इ वंत तो , हे कोमेस एंड तलक तो में एंड प्लेस अरंड :'( इट्स फुक्किंग हार्ड . बुत इ वांट तो लिखे हिम . इ वांट तो लव हिम , कण्व वही ? कज इ क्नोव ठाट इ'ल बे हप्पिएर ठाट वे . ओह नो , मय्बे इ'ल बे हप्पिएर इफ सोमेहोव हे लोवेस में बेक . बुत इ क्नोव ठाट'ल नेवर हप्पें . र्घत नो आईएम दमन कांफुसेद वेठेर इ श्ल्ड मोवे ओं और नो . हैः . माय फ्रिएंड्स सैद ठाट इ श्ल्ड मोवे ओं बुत इट्स हार्ड . हम . हेल्प में ?
ahahahah read that !! hm . i mean , dnt even try ? ahaha nothing lah iws just crapping shit .
i just finished watching the love guru , reminded me of someone , wtv . ahah . well its nice but they LOVE to mention anything that has to do with dick ! hahahah , omg okay too much info . life ? damn , life sucks now . everything seems to just stress me up somehow . everything is wrong . hm . watever lah , i just hope to die and mati keras anywhre but here , home . i wish to off my phone and PRETEND that i dnt have a phone cz its not functioning really well since TAK PENAH NK ADA MSG MASUK . sheesh . okay now seriously you guys NEED to watch the love guru . hee
Wednesday, September 17, 2008!
HandWritten on; 9/17/2008
i love me ? hha
alrght then , ive to go and siap2 lah eventhough its just 5.30 . but pls undertsand im a anak dara yg suka siap lambat2 . haha minimum time to siap is 30 minutes . selagi tk 30 mins i wont turun . haha , okay dh . toodles (: oh yea ! i love you ? heheh
p/s : ank ayam ???? hahaha its rude to invade everyone's tagboard by the name of "anak ayam" . haha , if you wish to be one , i'll help you ya . hee . loves !
Tuesday, September 16, 2008!
HandWritten on; 9/16/2008
help me ? haih .
im sick of posting emo blogs , ahha even my friends says so . haiyoh ! okay stop . my 'NEW' life starts here (:
okay , im fine . im FINE !! hha , just got a 'hot story' bout them ppls . fucking stop it will you guys ? haha . okay schl ? nothing much . BOSAN . hahaha . plus im currently in a state of confusion abt something . they say this , but I say that . he says ?? hahaha , okay stop merepek-ing . okay this week punya MAYBE(s) :-
- going to sunway bcz me , chui shen , yan ling , fana and albita (CIK Albita heheh) yearns fr a goodie bag , gosh desperate gila oh . haha . so gerak with CIK Albita thn MAYBE buka puasa sana , shoot straight off to taipan thn make a reservation at naili's fr friday . thn tuition -.-
- going to BUKA PUASA with class B and C at naili's ramai2 . cz ths week will be the last week the practical students are here . so sbb kterang syg CIK Al bita we plan lah mcm ni hee , we've planned that all our classmates kne puasa , bru fun ! hee . hope this plans jd , haha . $$ tkde dohh . sdih sdih . aha , be prepared nk kne mara or tk boleh pegi la kn :( stress aku -.-
okay dh . hee . nothing to say more . oh yea , i love you
Saturday, September 13, 2008!
HandWritten on; 9/13/2008
I LOVE YOU ,
okay stop , this hurts like hell . i have been crying on and off since yesterday and to be more specific with the crying thingy , i doesnt matter wether im with my mom , while im eating , while im at a restaurant yg full of humanoids , wherever !! i'll cry if i think about it again . it huuuurrrtss :( i wish fr this to stop as its killing me . i hate to be all emo-ish but i just cant help it . no motivations or motivaters fr example Dato Dr. Fadhilah Kamsar *i hope ive spelled it rght* cn calm me down . i think what people thought of me rght nw is , this thing is not bothering me that much but it isss !! goossshhh ,, god , please stop this . i beg of you . okay dh . hm .
guess what , i've been opening my puasa fr 3 times at the same restaurant in one week !! hahaha , twice wth friends and once wth family . omg , the waiters there dh knal my face and dh boring i think , err . i am currently in a shortage of $$$ sooo anyone jgn la mntk blanje . hahaha . sorray .
okay dh , stop . heheh . i love you .
Friday, September 12, 2008!
HandWritten on; 9/12/2008
it's true actually , the quote i mean . im so fcking stressed up by a person rght nw . not stressed up but disappointed actually . i seriously feel like i wnna cry the heck out of me . yea up to the extend that i feel like i wnna cry just fr the fact that i know i wont be THAT close to him anymore . haahhh , wtv laahh . today fr what i know , is the most emo-est day fr everyone . 12o9 . ill remember it . hah poyo . seriously . idk bout you guys but fr myself , ths morning , im nt talking to my mum . thn i went to school , time balek cm sial . thn i got back , onlined thn ada laaa ths person emo after that ths person then that person . haih . such a busy emo-ish day . sucks like hell . to be exact thre're some unavoidable crisis that seriously HAS jeopardised some friendships or even relationships . i dont know maan . today seriously sucks . someone that's significant to me vanishes frm my life or shld i say my rghts of jurisdiction OF my life . wtf ? idk what am i merepek-ing . crack
gila today . i feel like i wanna die laah . but like what fana said , tk guna jd the emo freak . i shld help myself cz if i dnt thn who will ? rght ? haih . okay dh , blogging about my problems is such a no no fr anyone who reads my blog cz i know its boring . hha sorry readers !
actually other than all those emo-ish stuffs , i just dont know wht to blog abt . life ? i mean LIFE is all oemo-ish rght noww . studies ? hahh , mmg out to the lombong thre lah kaan . 'apa nk jd lah ank dara ni' . yea yea wtv -.- love ? i do not wish to talk abt that rght now . family ? hm , no comment . i cn feel the GAP between us . wtv lah , i dnt thnk it matters to anyone . sheesh . school ? okayokay la . see , i hve nothing to blog abt . soo , might as well just publish ths freaking blog and waste my time by onlining and wtv -.-
have a nice day .
oh yea , before that . i feel very the *terasa when i listen to this song ,
We belong together And you know that I'm right Why do you play with my heart, why do you play with my mind? Said we'd be forever Said it'd never die How could you love me and leave me And never say good-bye? When I can't sleep at night without holding you tight Girl, each time I try I just break down and cry Pain in my head oh I'd rather be dead Spinnin' around and around Although we've come to the End Of The Road Still I can't let you go It's unnatural, you belong to me, I belong to you Come to the End of the Road Still I can't let you go It's unnatural, you belong to me, I belong to you Girl, I know you really love me, You just don't realize You've never been there before It's only your first time Maybe I'll forgive you, hmm Maybe you'll try We should be happy together Forever, you and I Can you love me again like you loved me before ?This time I want you to love me much more This time instead just come to my bed And baby just don't let me, don't let me down Girl I'm here for you All those times of night when you just hurt me And just run out with that other fella Baby I knew about it, I just didn't care You just don't understand how much I love you do you? I'm here for you I'm not out to go out and cheat on you all night Just like you did baby but that's all right Hey, I love you anyway And I'm still gonna be here for you 'till my dying day baby Right now, I'm just in so much pain baby Coz you just won't come back to me Will you? Just come back to me -
seriously im not dedicating ths song to anyone pun . trust me
Thursday, September 11, 2008!
HandWritten on; 9/11/2008
yesterday we 7 girls excluding shasha cz of a unavoidable reason went to buka puasa at taipan (: i love them sickos :p
whuaaa , im in the mood of tk betol rght now . hee . days are turning into those better days lah kn , haha much preferred days in contrary of the days yg nk gdo je ngn everyone and makes me wnt to go to alaska and tk balek2 smpai mati . haih . haha okay wtv lah , now moving on (: i love love love school nowadays . dnt know why . hha , except fr the times yg ddk lpak2 kt class thn fana bwt dajal . haha , lu bikin wa panas aa . but now pn i realise that im getting closer to all my classmates , hee . i love them (: *wink wink* hahahahaha . okay dh diam .
i have not been puasa-ing bcz of the "datang bulan" punya season sooo i guess i got dikecualikan , ngeheheh . cant say much about life , hee . wtv it is , im happy (: thanks to god ! alhamdulillah .. haha , alim alim . okay i kind of got myself addicted to word "whuaaaaa" . damn you hisyam ! i know by saying whuaaa i cn annoy people . but seriously its irresistable ! aha . hisyam is currently trying to make me feel angry towards him like everyday ! haha . its kind of annoying but bangga jugak la dpt compliment ' sue ni tkley mara oh ! ' whuaaa ! banggabangga ! hahaha .
okay guess what ? i've got a secret and dnt ask me what ! haha , but thn , i hate that secret . hahaha , i myself tk fhm wth am i talking abt . okay dh , excluding the complications , this secret is KILLING me cm babi . haha . seriously . dnt get me wrong okay human (:
Saturday, September 06, 2008!
HandWritten on; 9/06/2008
oh my gosh , to be honest i miss LOVE ! haha its kind of funny fr me to say it but yeaah , i do miss the feeling of loooveee . nt the type of 'love' which brings out the phrase ' i love you baby <33> haha , and nt the 'love' that makes you put his or her name or picture in myspace or blog or yr phone's wallpaper or wtv just to show people that you have a boyf/girlf . oh please . i miss the 'love' that i had once time duluu duluuu . i dnt miss the person lah ! sheesh . the FEEL . haha . seriously . the feeling which makes you think abt him all the freaking TIME ! and eventhough he makes stupid mistakes or even BIG mistakes , well , it does matter at first , but towards the end , you'll smile and just say i love you again . the feeling that makes you go crazy even if you're having a silly fight over silly things . the feeling that brings you joy when he's making you happy and brings you DEATH if he's making you sad . idk , whn it has ended it doesnt seem like anything to me . but after 6 or 7 months , it's starting to creep slowly in my head and makes me to want to have love again . i hate it . do you knw what i had at that time ? omg i cant describe . its like , you're crazy abt him and you know , i dont even bother to check other guys out . even if they're hot mana pon , i dnt care . all i think abt is him . he revolved around my world and it scares me sometimes when i just THINK that i know i'll lose him eventually . it kills me when we're having our first fight . seriously and honestly , i dnt miss him at all , i just miss the feel of it . the feel of knowing that you do have someone that'll be thre whn you're in the dumps . mmg la dia kne ada kn , if not emo la satu tahun ! haha . well , im not posting this blog just to be all mushy mushy abt luurrveeee .. in fact just to spill out the things that's haunting my head fr WEEKS ! the recent LOVE ws just the ones that i just 'care fr him' nt 'i wld do anything fr him' . haih . im not desperate fr a boyf , no . i admit i feel lonely . but what the heck ! apa gunanya scandal ? haha . jk . the recent love ws all about CARE . yes i admit i sayang him but just with suku suku hati je la . haha . a sayang him bcz he ws thre fr me . i sayang him bcz of his attitude . well i THOUGHT that he wld be the one that i'll LOVEEEE gila babi like i loved the one yg dulu tuuu . haih . but not to say that he's not perfect . he is , i do like him , but not the WHOLE package . his friends , his maki-makiness . no , i tk ktuk you dear . im not . hm . mcm samira ckp , 'tnggu laa , nnt2 ada la tuu' wheenn ??!?! but yea my friends and i know that whenever im SINGLE , im happy and cheery . whn im taken , i'll be all moody-ish and all . wht to do ?? haha . i guess this feeling will somehow fade away and i prefer to be single as no one can HURT me anymore .
im going to kl tmr with teyrasayang , haha . just to find maybe sandals or pumps or wtv . knw why ? cz this footwear that im wearing currently is OLD and i hate it . haha . plus , mama's having her class tmr and me teyra will buka our puasa with mama lah . save money maa . haha .
till we meet again (: loves <3
i love me ? hha
